Top 10 Bad Celebrity Baby Names

Published Categorized as David Beckham


The fourth child of Victoria and David Beckham was born this weekend at Cedars-Sinai Medical Center in Los Angeles. The two already have 3 sons: 12-year-old Brooklyn, 8-year old Romeo and 6-year-old Cruz, and finally welcome a baby girl, Harper Seven Beckham, to the ranks of their growing family.

The couple reportedly allowed their boys to help them come up with a name for their baby sister.  Why on earth they thought that was a good idea, we may never know.

As it turns out, the boys are fans of the show Wizards of Waverly Place and wanted to name their sister after the character Harper Finkle.  Her middle name, Seven, has been a lucky number for David Beckham since his days on Manchester United, and he’s always wanted to include the number in one of his children’s names.

A lot of people have been questioning the name choice, but when you think about it Harper isn’t all that strange as far as baby names go.

As far as I’m concerned, Harper Seven doesn’t even make it into my top 10 list of worst celebrity child names.

1. Kal-El Cage

Nicholas Cage is a fan of comics.  He even changed his own last name from Coppola to Cage after Marvel Comics character Luke Cage.  Following the comic theme, he named his son Kal-El after superman.

2. Pilot Lee

Jason Lee, from My Name is Earl named his son Pilot after gaining inspiration from a Grandaddy song.

3. Apple Paltrow

Back in 2004, Gwyneth Paltrow named her daughter Apple just because she thought it sounded lovely.

4. FifiTrixibelle

FifiTrixibelle definitely ranks up there with weird children’s’ names.  The Irish singer Bob Geldof named his daughter after his aunt Fifi, and he is fascinated with the lifestyles of southern belles, so her middle name is Trixibelle. It sounds more like a string of dog names, than a girl’s name.

5. Kyd Duchovny-Leoni

David Duchovny and his wife Tea Leoni have an interesting sense of humor naming their son Kyd.  If you ever wanted to shout “hey kid” at your child, just give them a name with a funny spelling and maybe people won’t notice.

6. Rocket Rodrigues

Have you always wanted to name your child Rocket? Well Robert Rodriguez apparently did.  Rockets younger siblings are Rebel, Racer, Rogue, and Rhiannon.  I bet every day in that house is a tongue twister.

7. Moon Unit Zappa

Frank Zappa deserves multiple entries for weirdness in kids’ names.  If Moon Unit and Diva Thin Muffin aren’t weird enough, how about Dweezil and Ahmet?  These poor kids have to live with the name calling and embarrassment of having Frank Zappa as their dad, as if that isn’t enough, why not give them a weird name too?

8. Ocean Whitaker

Forest Whitaker named his daughter Ocean because he wants his daughter to be inspired by her name and become expansive.  Forest told interviewers that he tries to follow his name and be revitalizing and always growing like a forest. Let’s hope she doesn’t interpret her name to mean huge and full of fish.

9. Sage Moonblood Stallone

Sylvester Stallone named his son Sage Moonblood.  Sage isn’t so bad, but at least Moonblood is only his middle name.

10. Tu Morrow

Have you ever considered giving your kid a name that’s a play on words? It looks like actor Rob Morrow did when he named his kid Tu Morrow.  Give me a break.  He is setting the kid up for ridicule for the rest of her life.  Not to mention that it isn’t even funny the first time you hear it, and certainly doesn’t grow on you with time.

This guest post is by Edwin Daniels, you can follow him on Twitter: @TheCelebutaunt.