Sex and the City 2: Please Make it Stop.

Posted by Alyssa on June 4th, 2010

Scenes from Michael Patrick King s Sex and the City 2

I knew the movies had gotten more and more ridiculous over the years, departing from the simple, charming plot lines of years past, but nothing could have prepared me for SATC 2. I don’t even know where to start with this catastrophe. Like many women, I loved the show, and have seen every episode, from pilot to Paris. BUT- I loved the show when it was for women, not pandering to a young, teenage demographic. Case in point: using Miley Cyrus as the young celebrity whose dress Samantha wears a duplicate of. Aside from my complete disdain for Miley Cyrus, the amount of blatant product placement is just obscene. Dior, Louis Vuitton, Fendi, Hermes’ Birkin…the list goes on.

Oops! Kim Cattrall and Miley Cyrus shoot a scene for Sex and the City 2 where they turn up for a movie premiere in the same outfit!

The first movie was fairly outlandish, but it still remained in the realm of the possible. The sequel, on the other hand, was the definition of excess and improbability. Um, Liza much anyone? I think when the wedding concluded with Liza Minelli singing Beyonce’s “Single Ladies,” I knew it was going to take some serious strength to not mock this movie aloud and annoy my fellow movie-goers.

Scenes from Michael Patrick King s Sex and the City 2

Next let me get to Carrie’s cute little quips. If I hear her say anything along of the lines of “I don’t think we’re in Kansas anymore” one more time, I may stab myself. She also makes us proud with her befuddlement over $20 shoes for sale in the souk. You’re in a Middle Eastern country at a street bazaar. There are no Manolo Blahniks for at least a few miles Carrie, even in Abu Dhabi. This is of course unless you pit stop and chit chat with the black market men.

Don’t get me started on the extravagant ensembles purchased for the camel ride through the desert. I just never knew Louboutins were acceptable footwear for romps through the sand dunes. Fortunately, I am now enlightened.

If I get the image of Samantha wearing what appear to medieval weapon shoulder pads, singing “I Am Woman” out of my head, it will be a wonder. It’s not looking good, but I’m optimistic.

Photo credit: Craig Blankenhorn, courtesy Warner Bros.

Next, Carrie, how lucky that the man you bought your $20 shoes from just happened to still have your passport waiting for you when you went to look for it days later. That is definitely a common occurrence. When I say common occurrence, I really mean “would never ever happen,” but what’s the difference in this movie?

Also, could we make Americans look any more disrespectful and ignorant? Miranda gave us a little credit with her guide books and urges to respect Islamic tradition, but Samantha’s bare-all wardrobe, overly sexual innuendo, condom-hurling, cursing and middle-finger displaying really makes SATC 2 a “Why Americans Shouldn’t Travel” guide.

The outrageous nature of the movie didn’t even make it enjoyable. I found myself glancing at my cell phone for a time check in half-hour intervals. Let us pray for the prevention of a third movie. Seriously, what would the storyline be? Samantha turns 70, Charlotte sends the little brats to boarding school, Miranda and Steve manage to look like an even more awkward couple and Carrie, well Carrie finally runs out of room for her shoes and finds herself in crisis mode yet again.

Category: Movie Reviews, Sex and the City 2