Justin Bieber Is Going To Win All The Emmys

Posted by Moxie on September 13th, 2010

Singer Justin Bieber arrives at the MTV Video Music Awards in Los Angeles on September 12, 2010 in Los Angeles. UPI/Jim Ruymen Photo via Newscom

And they aren’t even going to wait until next year! The Academy of Televisual Whoozywhatsits is going to have super-special program dedicated solely to Justin Bieber. He’s going to squeak pubescently and flail in a vaguely choreographed manner and smile gummily all while wearing one of Justin Timberlake’s old *NSYNC tracksuits. It will be marvelous, and every girl under the age of ten will pee herself in sheer delight. Such is the power of The Bieber.

And why does he deserve such dedications of praise?, you might ask. Silence, fool! You dare question the rightness of the glories visited upon The Bieber?! But if the naysayer demands proof, so be it:

Scrumtrulescent! Never have I see a block of wood give such a lifelike performance! And can we get an extra Emmy for his toupee? If you please.

Category: Justin Bieber, Justin Timberlake, Moxie, Television