Celebrity Trainwrecks

LeeAnn Rimes Isn’t Skinny Enough

Posted by Rebecca on March 17th, 2011

According to her.  In rebuttal, here’s her looking like Skeletor.   Photo:INFDaily.com She keeps saying how healthy she looks, but according to People Magazine, “Recent photos show the singer, who is known for being in great shape, looking particularly slim.” SO, THAT’S THE UNDERSTATEMENT OF THE CENTURY.  Christ, go marry your homewrecker and eat a […]


Tags:Celebrity Stupidity, Celebrity Trainwrecks, Celebrity Weight Gossip, LeAnn Rimes

10 Fugly Looks by Miley Cyrus

Posted by Rebecca on March 17th, 2011

Well well well, Ms. Cyrus.  Looks like you’ve had a lot more fashion crimes than meet the eye.  I mean, I know you’re young and all, but aren’t you rich enough to get a little Hot Topic Stylist, or 12? When I was a young teenager, I had no excuse. Come, let’s explore your fashion […]


Tags:Celebrity Photos, Celebrity Trainwrecks, Miley Cyrus

Bachelor Picks Emily Maynard

Posted by Rebecca on March 15th, 2011

now she can finally change her name from something that sounds like a European mayonnaise derivative to the most country bumpkinest name ever.  Oh yeah, here’s a picture of our famed winner, presumably at a dentists office. And I do mean WINNER. VICTOR.  She won.  As far as romance…well, not so much. Emily Maynard, who […]


Tags:Celebrity Stupidity, Celebrity Trainwrecks, Celebrity Wedding, Television

Taylor Momsen: Beer Gut Alert

Posted by Rebecca on March 7th, 2011

Look, it’s been a perfectly pleasant afternoon,  and now it looks even rosier. Why? Because the bane of my EXISTENCE- the whiny, entitled, mascaroed Taylor Momsen has a beer gut. Or gee, I don’t know. Maybe it’s like, Satan’s baby. Or, like, a weird angle.  But that mesh tank and bra can’t hide all that […]


Tags:Celebrity Trainwrecks, Celebrity Weight Gossip, Taylor Momsen

Christina Aguilera Battling Alcoholism?

Posted by PZ on March 2nd, 2011

Forget Charlie Sheen, there is a new train-wreck hot mess in town – it’s Christina Aguilera. According to a close friend, Aguilera has been drowning her recent sorrows by going on a variety of wild night outs, all of which involve heavy drinking. Christina was arrested alongside her new boyfriend in the early hours of […]


Tags:Celebrity Trainwrecks, Christina Aguilera

Charlie Sheen’s Publicist Quits

Posted by Rebecca on February 28th, 2011

Shocker. Stan Rosenfeld, Sheen’s long time publicist is finally giving up on the husk of a man that is Charlie Sheen.  According to TMZ, Rosenfeld said that he: “worked with Charlie Sheen for a long time and I care about him very much, however, at this time, I’m unable to work effectively as his publicist […]


Tags:Celebrity Heroes, Celebrity Hook-ups, Celebrity Liars, Celebrity Rehab, Celebrity Scandal, Celebrity Scandals, Celebrity sex tapes, Celebrity Stupidity, Celebrity Trainwrecks, Charlie Sheen

SHOCKER: Denise Richards Wants to Be a Real Housewife

Posted by Rebecca on February 18th, 2011

I think everything I know and love has come crumbling down, into a web of lies.  Psych! I mean, it’s business as usual here at GTS, because Denise Richards wants attention. When asked if she’d want to be on the show,  Richards vehemently said, “Heck yeah I would!  It’s one of my favorite shows.” With […]


Tags:Celebrity Endorsements, Celebrity Stupidity, Celebrity Trainwrecks, Denise Richards, Reality TV

Ashlee Simpson: Untrustable.

Posted by Rebecca on February 18th, 2011

And we didn’t see this coming?  I mean, she lied about a nosejob.  You know, on her FACE. Simpson, apparently, liked to hang out at all hours of the night, with a crew of pro skateboarders?  in San Clemente, California?  Are you kidding me? She’s a MOM, she’s not a 12 year old hot topic […]


Tags:Ashlee Simpson, Celebrity Liars, Celebrity Stupidity, Celebrity Trainwrecks, Pete Wentz

Kelly Osbourne’s Ex Cheated on Her With a Tranny.

Posted by Rebecca on January 17th, 2011

BREAKING NEWS, People. According to the Mirror, Kelly Osbourne was LIVID at fiancé Luke Worrall when she found out he was ­having a secret affair…but what she didn’t know were these messed up, crucial other little details of their tryst. 1.  the girl in the affair looked just like Kelly Osbourne 2. Said girl was […]


Tags:Celebrity Scandal, Celebrity Scandals, Celebrity Stupidity, Celebrity Surgery, Celebrity Trainwrecks, Kelly Osbourne

Paris Hilton: I Promise to Deliver REAL Me on New Reality Show

Posted by Rebecca on January 14th, 2011

Ohhh! Yooo! Paris done gone and dun it again!  She’s reinventing what it means to be mediocre! Paris is getting a NEW television show,  called The World According to Paris. What? But I’m not sick of seeing that BFF show above my public access television schedule channel (channel 2 anyone? No? Anyone? Bueller?). Anyhoo, it’s […]


Tags:Brooke Mueller, Celebrity Scandals, Celebrity Stupidity, Celebrity Trainwrecks, Paris Hilton

And…Jennifer Aniston is Drunk.

Posted by Rebecca on January 6th, 2011

Know what I love about celebrities? I can see them hammered, along with the rest of the world. Huzzah! Jennifer Aniston decided to give a little speechy-weechy at the People’s Choice Awards. According to PopEater, “(Aniston) resented the evening’s first award for Favorite Comedic Star, appeared to have a difficult time coherently delivering her introduction, […]


Tags:Celebrity Trainwrecks, Jennifer Aniston

David Arquette in Rehab

Posted by Angela on January 2nd, 2011

David Arquette has made some highly controversial remarks after his recent split with Courteney Cox. He even told Howard Stern that his psychologist believed he was having a “nervous breakdown” and that he had been “drinking a lot.” Now the actor’s rep confirms that he has entered rehab for drinking and depression.


Tags:Celebrity Breakups, Celebrity Rehab, Celebrity Trainwrecks, Courteney Cox, David Arquette

Amber Portwood Makes WHAT?

Posted by Rebecca on December 30th, 2010

I can’t even type right now. I think I just had a minor, Portwood-fuelled stroke. Jesus christ. Okay, let me backtrack.  You see,  after Amber was booked on two felony accounts of EX-BOYFRIEND BEATING (yeah, it’s a real charge, people. I’m a lawyer and also a beater upper of people, so I should know),  she […]


Tags:Amber Portwood, Celebrity Endorsements, Celebrity Feuds, Celebrity Scandal, Celebrity Stupidity, Celebrity Trainwrecks, MTV, Teen Mom, Television

Joe Francis’ Wife Moves Out

Posted by Rebecca on December 30th, 2010

Less than two months after their really classy nuptials and four years of courtship,  Joe Francis’ wife, CBS reporter Christina McLarty moved out of their house…and maybe out of wedlock altogether. Talk about a girl (WOMAN) going wild (n’ out).  See how I did that? Though Francis denies the news, he was overheard talking about […]


Tags:Celebrity Couples, Celebrity Scandals, Celebrity sex tapes, Celebrity Trainwrecks

Cry Me a Lohan.

Posted by Rebecca on December 28th, 2010

Know what I love best about the Lohans?  Trick question- NOTHING.  But I do appreciate the whiny pervasive din that is the Lohan entitlement, especially since it showcases how frigging ridiculous this dynasty of idiots are. So, what’s new? Well, the new film entitled Dogs in Pocketbooks, TMZ reports, is in a likeness suit brought […]


Tags:Celebrity Liars, Celebrity Rehab, Celebrity Scandal, Celebrity Scandals, Celebrity Stupidity, Celebrity Trainwrecks, Lindsay Lohan

Gwyneth Paltrow: Everything is Weird.

Posted by Rebecca on December 24th, 2010

According to US News,  everything about being Gwyneth Paltrow, post like, last month, was totally weird. According to the article, here are things that were totally weird with Gwyneth Paltrow: 1.  Dating Brad Pitt 2. Dating Ben Affleck 3. Not having money before being ridiculously rich and famous 4. Not being able to go out […]


Tags:Ben Affleck, Brad Pitt, Celebrity Stupidity, Celebrity Talent, Celebrity Trainwrecks, Gwyneth Paltrow

Wait, Stephen Baldwin and Kevin Costner were Friends?

Posted by Rebecca on December 24th, 2010

Well, I guess that was news to me. Anyhoo,  one of the lesser Baldwings is claiming that Kevin Costner and his business partner  “schemed” to make millions of dollars off the BP oil rig disaster, by allegedly convincing Baldwin (again, the lesser) to sell shares in a company that sells crazy fantastical machines that separate […]


Tags:Celebrity Scandal, Celebrity Stupidity, Celebrity Trainwrecks, Kevin Costner, Stephen Baldwin

Dancing With The Stars Recruiting Lindsay Lohan?

Posted by Rebecca on December 1st, 2010

Wow.  Lindsay would go where she belongs, in the ranks of other D list celebrities. RadarOnline learned exclusively that Dancing with the Stars has been eyeing the Herbie actress as a potential useless addition for the upcoming DWTS season. “Dancing with the Stars producers have had Lindsay on their wish list of castmates for a […]


Tags:Celebrity Comebacks, Celebrity Endorsements, Celebrity Stupidity, Celebrity Trainwrecks, Dancing With The Stars, Lindsay Lohan, Uncategorized

Charlie Sheen’s lawyer says hooker is a liar

Posted by Christine on November 22nd, 2010

Charlie Sheen’s attorney Yale Galanter released a statement saying that adult film actress Capri Anderson who was with Sheen on the night of his alleged coke fueled naked rage at an NYC hotel is an outright liar and that Sheen was not violent and abusive towards her that night.


Tags:Capri Anderson, Celebrity Trainwrecks, Charlie Sheen

Heidi Montag is the Dumbest Person on Earth.

Posted by Rebecca on November 19th, 2010

Congrats, Ms. Montag.  You’re in danger of things like bleeding too much and choking on things that you don’t chew well enough. Why? Because you’re a big freaking idiot.


Tags:Celebrity Accidents, Celebrity Photos, Celebrity Stupidity, Celebrity Surgery, Celebrity Trainwrecks, Heidi Montag, Spencer Pratt, The Hills

David Arquette Is Handling Things Like A Grown-Up

Posted by Moxie on November 15th, 2010

You know, it was pretty inevitable that Courteney Cox and David Arquette would split. She was just too…what’s the word…immature for him, you know? I mean, you could see when they were together that he was just tolerating her childish bullshit, and there’s only so long you can be your spouse’s parent. The dignified way […]


Tags:Celebrity Breakups, Celebrity Stupidity, Celebrity Trainwrecks, Courteney Cox, David Arquette, Jennifer Aniston, Spencer Pratt

Snooki’s Birthday, Sponsored by LifeStyles Condoms.

Posted by Rebecca on November 15th, 2010

Appropriate!  And, disgusting. Freebies and handjobs available upon request. The New York Post reports Snooki’s 23rd birthday is going to be a big one, with lots of hot sex.  Well, sex, probably. 


Tags:Celebrity Stupidity, Celebrity Trainwrecks, Jersey Shore, Snooki

Jessica Simpson is engaged, stupid, and lacking a Pre-Nup.

Posted by Rebecca on November 15th, 2010

“Fool me once, and…Gawd, I dunno.” Not engaged and you’re stupid, but like, she’s still a FRIGGIN IDIOT. Here’s why:


Tags:Celebrity Couples, Celebrity Stupidity, Celebrity Trainwrecks, Celebrity Wedding, Jessica Simpson

David Cassidy Rebuttal…?

Posted by Rebecca on November 5th, 2010

Sure, I guess. Apparently, David Cassidy is telling everyone that he wasn’t drunk, and he’s going to fight his DUI charge. You know, for the fans. What fans? Good question.  Oh, for his own pride. Pride? What pride? Oh. Good question. According to TMZ, “David’s rep, Jo-Ann Geffen, tells TMZ … the former teen idol […]


Tags:Celebrity Stupidity, Celebrity Trainwrecks